Panda Dig Breaking News: Wen Jiabao Pledges to Remove Missiles

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Saturday September 25, by Jerome F. Keating Ph.D.

It is no secret that China continues to increase its military budget and beef up its military threat against Taiwan. However China's Premier Wen Jiabao surprised everyone recently when he commented that the some 1500 plus Chinese missiles deployed against Taiwan would be removed "some day." Many were shocked but then astute reporters noticed that the English translation of Wen's remarks omitted a key phrase at the end of the sentence. i.e. Wen stated, "Our missiles aimed at Taiwan will be removed some day, when pigs learn to fly."

Despite this revelation by reporters, the government of Chinese Nationalist Party (KMT) and its president Ma Ying-joke were ecstatic. Ma Ying-joke immediately proclaimed, "This proves that my kowtowing cross-strait efforts at détente are working. All we need to do is teach pigs how to fly and we will have peace in our time."

Mas Premier Wu Den-yih was less effusive but nevertheless declared it was a sign of "goodwill." Wu added, "At least Wen did not spit after he made the remarks."

When pressed about his comments, Chinese Premier Wen Jiabao went on. "Of course Mr. Ma should be happy with our concession. But let's get serious, once we have Taiwan economically dependent on China, we won't need the missiles. Mr. Ma understands that and that is why he is helping us." Your vigilant Panda Dig reporters will keep you posted on any future developments.